A Baby Jesus Story

Christmas tends to make people nostalgic. Besides that it is the time when families tend to gather, it is also the end of another year, which calls for reminiscing.

My son, like many children, has always been fond of babies, and Baby Jesus is all the more special. Last year, he even got to play Jesus' "step" father Joseph at the Christmas play at my mother's church. Mary was played by a lovely brown-eyed blond. Sparky tried to put his arm around her during the whole play, which she rebuffed quite visibly. "Well, she was my wife!" was his explanation.

But back to Baby Jesus. From his youngest years, Sparky tended to kidnap B.J. from the little nativity scenes my mother puts out around the house. Finally, she decided one of the Jesus-in-the-manger figures would have to take one for the team, and she gave Sparky his very own Baby Jesus. It was a little ceramic or porcelain model, much like the one pictured here. He treasured it. He played with it all the time and with all his other toys. B.J. was regularly protected by Power Rangers or guarded by Luke Skywalker.

Needless to say, Sparky developed what some would call "a personal relationship" with his Lord. So much so that B.J. suffered much abuse and roughhousing. This culminated in a spectacle, witnessed by many, that I will cherish as one of my fondest holiday memories.

One evening, when we had a house full of company, he came running into the living room saying, "Look at my Baby Jesus trick! Look at my Baby Jesus trick!"

Then he shot Baby Jesus across the room out of his pirate ship cannon.

I realize it is blasphemous that I laughed my ass off about this, but I couldn't help it. Since then, I have always thought Baby Jesus Trick would be a great name for a band.