Glad It's Over

Don't get me wrong. I'm no Scrooge. I actually enjoy Christmas. Mostly. I like the lights. I like buying presents and wrapping presents. Of course, I like getting presents too sometimes. What I don't like is the bullshit.

This year my household nearly came to blows over where and when we celebrated with each set of in-laws. Christmas Eve? Saturday before Christmas? Morning? Evening? Meet at the rest stop halfway between?

It wasn't always like this. Before you get married, your holidays are set. You know where you go on what day and there is no question. But then the grandchildren grow up and get married and you have this whole other set of in-laws and outlaws around which to plan. And the more grandchildren there are in a family, the more interlopers there are with which to contend.

And invariably, each Christmas is expected to exceed the last in grandiosity. Bigger presents, better presents, more expensive presents. Exotic food. Strange "new" traditions, which is an absolute oxymoron. As much fun as Dirty Santa is, Mother, don't come around telling me we have "always done it" when we have not and I only ever heard of it three years ago!

Next year I am thinking of boycotting Christmas outright. Well, not a complete boycott. I'll still buy presents, but I'll have them delivered by mail the week before. That will save me on wrapping paper and tape as well. And perhaps that 20 pounds of holiday weight gain as well.